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50 Questions to Ask Your Aging Parent Before It's Too Late

For adult children, grandchildren, and anyone who loves an older adult. Fifty questions, seven themes, and a few honest tips on how to actually use them.

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What is inside

01
Origins

What shaped them, before the rest of us knew them.

02
The People Who Made You

The ones who shaped them, and the ones we never got to meet.

03
Love

The person they chose, the love that stayed, the loss that did not leave.

04
Work, Vocation, Sacrifice

What they did with their days, and what it cost.

05
What You Learned

The wisdom from the long way around.

06
What You Have Held Onto

The objects, places, and traditions that carry the story.

07
What You Want Me To Carry

The questions worth saving for last. The ones families regret most.

How to actually use them

Do not sit someone down with a list of fifty questions. That is an interview, and it makes people close up. Ask one. Let the answer go where it wants to go. The best material almost never comes from the question you asked.

Record it if you can, even badly, on the phone in your pocket. A shaky recording of someone's actual voice is worth more in twenty years than a tidy paragraph you wrote down afterwards.

And start with the easy ones. Section seven holds the questions families most often regret not asking, but they are not where you begin.